So, I went to gym all week. I’ve really gotten into this “gym vibe”. I love the feeling of cycling till I cant feel my legs, and the aftermath of lifting weights. Its pain but you know, its the good kind of pain. The pain of satisfaction. I actually love going to gym, before it used to a chore or a nightmare, something id do everything just to get out of. But now ill do anything just to go to gym. I’ve been working so hard at the gym, so damn hard, I never give up till I’ve reached my target on each machine. Never.
Unfortunately I lost my motivation yesterday when I checked my weight. However, after i cried for a couple of minutes, I got up marched into the kitchen with the thought “this isn’t going to work, i’m never going to be healthy, might as well enjoy some food”. Then mom stopped me. She said were going our Eid shopping (the celebration after Ramadan, the month of fasting which is starting soon.) So we went out clothes shopping. Now as a kid, teenager and what not i was fat. Plain words, just big and fat, and I always had to wear women sizes, adult sizes. It made me really upset and i always felt embarrassed in front of the shop keepers and all the other slim girls. I eventually got to a stage where i couldn’t wear ready made clothes anymore, my mummy sewed them all. But that day. That day i went in and I saw this GORGEOUS navy blue dress and i wanted it, it was ready made. The “smallest dress” I’d ever fit into was XL, this dress was L. Looking at it i was like hell no that’s not fitting that’s ripping, but mom said no try it on you’ve lost weight. So i did, and hell yeah it fit! It fit with space at the sides, literally the happiest day of my life, okay well not the happiest but hell yeah i was happy. So all in all, I didn’t comfort it because i didn’t lose enough weight and i found out i can now fit into smaller clothes than i used to.
Friday the 4th of June – 182 lbs
Saturday the 13th of June – 181 lbs
email for any queries, advice, to listen, problems, I’m here.